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May 2015

Movie Marathon

May 30, 2015
Musee D’Orsay, 1 Rue de la Légion d'Honneur www.musee-orsay.fr/en/‎
Paris, 75007 France
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$49

What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway. I'm going to the back seat of my car, with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes! And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold. The Internet King? I wonder…

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June 2015

Farmer’s Market

June 5, 2015 - June 6, 2015
Krispy Kreme, 6935 South Lindbergh
St. Louis, MO 63129 United States
$300

Who's that then? Shh! Knights, I bid you welcome to your new home. Let us ride to Camelot! Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system! The Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. That is why I am your king. Camelot!

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July 2015

Weekend Long Adventure

July 10, 2015 - July 11, 2015
San Diego Zoo, 2920 Zoo Drive www.sandiegozoo.org/
San Diego, CA 92101 United States
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$78

Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please, eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot. You don't win friends with salad. I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. D'oh. A lifetime of working with nuclear power has left me with a healthy green glow…and left me as impotent as a Nevada boxing commissioner. No children have ever meddled with the Republican Party and lived to tell about it.

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Cupcake Decorating

July 24, 2015
Art Institute of Chicago, 111 S Michigan Ave www.artic.edu/
Chicago, IL 60603 United States
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$45

Oh God, my uncle. How am I ever gonna explain this? The plans you refer to will soon be back in our hands. I suggest you try it again, Luke. This time, let go your conscious self and act on instinct. I want to come with you to Alderaan. There's nothing for me here now. I want to learn the ways of the Force and be a Jedi, like my father before me. As you wish. I don't know what…

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September 2018

Kitten Adoption Day

September 11, 2018
Kaboko, Ealing
London, 078585 United Kingdom
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$200

I've done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! Our differences are only skin deep, but our sames go down to the bone. And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold. And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker. What good…

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